Posted by Steve
There was no Scouting Report of the Week last week because I attended three of the games and also missed the one day game, so there wasn’t much to choose from. I did happen to catch the tail end of the segment while walking through the concourse last Sunday, and noticed one of the keys on Manny Parra was “Manny-ing up.” So that had to be a gem.
This week’s winner is yet again about Manny Parra, who clearly brings out the best (worst?) in Bill. Again, I didn’t see this one live—Dan told me about it, so I didn’t hear word-for-word how they were described.
Six Pack. Manny Parra is a chiseled, barrel-chested Adonis with a washboard stomach. Or this is referring to Manny having six straight wins entering the game. (Side note: I think watching Manny Parra pitch is the pitching equivalent of watching Ryan Braun hit. Parra is so talented, yet he walks too many guys and throws way too many pitches. He could be a 1-2 type pitcher if he simply attacked more. Just like Braun being super-good yet swinging at garbage pitches.)
No walks. Speaking of Manny’s walks, Bill lands on it here. Obviously it’s a perfectly good point, because he walks too many guys, but it’s not really a scouting report. Plus, not walking guys is another one of those generic points that is crucial for the success of ANY pitcher.
M&M. Earlier this season was Manny’s “first time,” and now we see that he loves candy. Is he even younger than everyone thought? As it turns out, M&M actually refers to Mauer and Morneau. So basically, it’s a scouting report on the Twins rather than the pitcher. And by scouting report, I mean simply a true statement: Joe Mauer and Justin Morneau play for the Twins.